"Presenteeism" -- going to work when you're sick -- is as contagious as the flu. Millions of Americans are doing it. By one estimate, upwards of 75% head to work with the common cold or other problems.

There are people who believe they shouldn’t call in sick, ever. For others it is often the self-excuse that they want to “save” their sick time for when they feel even more sick.  If you’re one of those people who believes you should “tough it out” when you’re ill and show up to work anyway, you’re the person who will likely contribute to other people catching your illness. 

Research shows that people sick with the common cold are not very productive. In fact, their lost productivity accounts for up to 60% of employer health costs -- more than if they'd taken a sick day.

So you wake up with a common cold or some other ailment that's getting you down. What should you do?  I wanted to offer you a common checklist of symptoms that can help you determine if you have a common cold or something else (remember, as I have warned you before, see your own doctor for medical advise... see me for comedy relief):

Sniffling

• If you are sniffling -- but not achy, not feverish, and feel fine otherwise -- it's probably allergies. So, avoid dogs, cats, dust, grass, trees, and air, but… Get to work!
• Sniffling, achy, tired, feverish? You may have watched too many TV commercials the night before, or more probably you may be coming down with the common cold or the flu. You are contagious in those first days. You are miserable, face it. You're not going to get much done at work.  Also, you will recover quicker from the common cold or flu if you get some rest.

Chills, Sweats

• If your clothes are getting drenched, you likely have a fever (that is if you are not standing at that moment in the shower fully clothed). Drink fluids and consider seeing a doctor. Stay away from work until you feel better, please.
• If you have a fever plus white patches on your tonsils (say "ah"), it may be strep throat. It's highly contagious, and I can assure you that no one at work wants to catch it!  You may need an antibiotic. See a doctor!

Coughing

• If it's a tickle in the throat or it feels like postnasal drip, the cough is probably from allergies or the common cold. Unless you've got other common cold symptoms, such as aches or fever, get to work!
• If the cough feels deep, makes you short of breath, or brings up discolored mucus (yuck), it's likely more than the common cold -- perhaps bronchitis or pneumonia.  (Did I mention that Riverside County has an excellent group of employee medical plans to choose from) See a doctor!

Earache

• If your ear really hurts, if you can't hear well, you may have an ear infection (but first check to see if you fell a sleep with your ear buds still in). Congestion from a common cold (like an iPod turned up too loud) can also leave your ear in pain. You need to see a doctor to see what is the cause of your pain. You may need an antibiotic or medication for the pain. (If that doesn’t work, ask the kid at BEST BUY how you turn down the volume again.)

Pinkeye

• If your eyes are red, if there's creamy white or yellow yucky stuff in the corners, if your eyelashes are getting matted it is not Revlon gone bad, but rather what is called pinkeye, which is contagious. Don't go to work, no one will want to see eye to eye with you no matter how strong an argument you make. Better yet, see a doctor to determine whether you need an antibiotic. Pinkeye can be viral or bacterial. It's another infection that may need antibiotic help.  For heaven’s sake, make sure to wash your hands frequently to avoid infecting anyone else.

Sinus Pain

• Pain around the eyes, top of the forehead, the cheekbones, even the top of your teeth could be symptoms of a sinus infection (I hate that don’t you). Call in sick and see a doctor to determine if you need an antibiotic or treatment for your symptoms. Next day, you'll likely be able to get yourself to work since sinus infections aren't typically contagious, but co-workers will probably snicker behind your back about what a lame excuse you used. 

Tummy Problems

• A stomach virus -- nausea, vomiting, watery diarrhea, aches, low-grade fever -- can lay you low for several days stay. But those symptoms could be due to other causes that warrant medical treatment. Take off from work and see a doctor to get an official diagnosis and adequate treatment.  (I had a joke to go with this advice, but remembered that I was better than stooping to the use of guttural humor.  So, I won’t tell you about the employee who called in sick, explaining to the boss that they had taken ExLax before leaving for work along with Prozac…  and couldn’t get off the pot, but felt good about it.)

Sprains/Strains

• Go to work if you sit at a computer all day, but try to keep that leg elevated while seated; wear appropriate clothing if you follow this suggestion. If you're on your feet, you will have more swelling (stands to reason, no pun intended), so wait until you can walk with little discomfort. An Ace bandage will give support to an ankle. Anti-inflammatory pain relievers can help most people, even if they're not in a lot of pain, because they reduce swelling; take it with food so your stomach isn't irritated. (You can make up your own joke for this part; I am staying away form drug humor involving food.)
• An ice pack is a good way to reduce swelling without risking stomach problems.  (If you are out ice skating and sprain something, just continue to lay on the rink floor after falling and you will do yourself some good… that is if no one runs into you.  Otherwise, you really will need a doctor.)

Headaches/Migraines

• Though headaches can be caused by things like the common cold, if you can't tolerate noise or light, you may have a migraine and shouldn't be at work. If you haven't seen a doctor for recurrent headaches, make an appointment… and then, make an appointment with a Human Resources Recruiter. A doctor can assess the cause of your headache… a Recruiter can find you a new quieter job. 

 Poison Ivy

• This shouldn't keep you at home (unless your eyes are swollen shut). The rash is not contagious and you can't pass it to anyone else, thankfully. People often mistakenly think that the poison ivy is spreading from one area of their body to another. However, experts advise that poison ivy develops only when you come in direct contact with urushiol, the substance in poison ivy that triggers the allergic reaction.  Chalk this up to experience… next time you will know better than to go into the woods, no matter what you’re promised. 

Well, I am blogged out, but I will leave you with one final piece of medical advise … don’t get stuck in the blood pressure machine down at the CVS Pharmacy… like I did.  (If I couldn’t sell that as an excuse for not showing up for work, I doubt you could either.)